One of the most common forms of invalidation I see is, ‘My child hasn’t expressed these feelings so yours aren’t valid’. The problem with this is that it puts an immense amount of responsibility on children to educate themselves on racism and adoption trauma. People assume if a child doesn’t speak up about these things, … More MY ADOPTION STORY Pt. 77 | I DIDN’T HAVE THE LANGUAGE | NOT AN ADOPTEE’S RESPONSIBILITY
As a transracial adoptee, I had always felt in-between. Being torn between two families, cultures, races, and identities. It wasn’t until recently that I have started embracing feeling in-between and owning my identity as a Chinese, transracial adoptee. It has taken a lot of work, and it wasn’t always easy. In this video I discuss … More MY ADOPTION STORY Pt. 76 | FEELING IN-BETWEEN
Learning Chinese was something I attempted to do as a child. I didn’t appreciate Saturday school. Even though my parents said I would regret quitting later on, I still stopped. I do regret quitting. But I am also thankful I wasn’t forced into it because, knowing me, that would lead to me resenting my birth … More Little Gifts to Learn Chinese
You all submitted questions, and I am finally answering them! My videos are filmed and scheduled to publish weeks in advance. While I had the energy to discuss these topics then, I may be in a different place now. I don’t want any adoptee to feel like I am ignoring their connections. I just have … More MY ADOPTION STORY Pt. 75 | YOU ASKED, I ANSWERED! | Q & A
People always ask me about how it was having a Chinese, transracial adoptee as a sister. Parents wonder if they should adopt another child of the same race and/or ethnicity as their child. Having a Chinese adoptee as a sister was nice, but it didn’t magically solve all the issues with adoption and transracial adoption. … More MY ADOPTION STORY Pt. 73 | I have a Chinese, TRA sister
Here’s the disclaimer to ensure you read until the end: NOT ALL PARENTS INVALIDATE ADOPTEES After spending a few years in various adoption groups online, a common theme in all is: adoptees being silenced and written off for being “disrespectful and argumentative”. When I see those comments, I scratch my head. Looking at the comment … More Is it Disrespect or just Disagreement?
Why am I writing this and not just ignoring the haters? Because I know about all the adoptees feeling alone and watching advocates being gaslighted when sharing their experiences. When you relate to someone sharing, and you see them being attacked for it, that automatically puts some fear into your mind that it’ll happen to … More Triggers are Valid
Today was supposed to be a happy day. Just like it was supposed to be the best day of my life exactly one year ago. Instead of a wedding, I was blindsided and handed a broken engagement. Two days after my would-be-wedding, I was given a re-examination of my doctoral qualifying exams and was terrified … More I Was Supposed to Be Celebrating
Hi, everyone! You probably found me due to the latest news regarding an adoption influencer and re-homing her son. I wanted to give another update and also welcome you to the channel. I share A LOT about my adoption story and hope that adoptees may find validation and support through my videos. It’s an added … More MY ADOPTION STORY | NEW SUBS AND INFLUENCER UPDATE | CHAT TIME
Re: https://www.insider.com/myka-stauffer-youtube-instagram-backlash-for-rehoming-special-needs-son-2020-5?amp&fbclid=IwAR3mJuSen6FViWaB8-XZcPgju1p4lcTtZkrDL3r4-PmfUvP-V2CAxOcGbZM Warning: You can read the article, but please reconsider watching their videos. Every click gives their monetized videos more ad money. Almost 3 years ago when I began the adoptee advocacy journey on YouTube, this channel kept getting suggested to me. We even commented on one or two of each other’s videos when … More Profiting from family separation and trauma is WRONG.