Adopted kids grow up to be (outspoken) adult adoptees.

I’m not here to provide loopholes. I’m not spending my time answering questions that are so obviously used to gain permission to continue unhealthy behavior. I am not an enabler. I will have genuine conversations with you that challenge your beliefs. I may play devil’s advocate to force you into considering unknown perspectives. I’ll call … More Adopted kids grow up to be (outspoken) adult adoptees.

Gaslighting at its finest

Something really gross happened this morning. In a comment, someone resorted to gaslighting and claimed my advocacy is the reason why no one is lining up to adopt from foster care–they’ll gladly wait years for that “blank-slate” newborn. I don’t have enough empathy. I’m too judgmental. For adopted people, there is almost always an element … More Gaslighting at its finest

My identity is not a mask I can take off when things get tough.

Trigger Warning: Offensive language against Chinese people (used to describe a racist situation) People tell me to stop talking about race when I’m an adoptee advocate. They tell me to not talk about adoption when I’m discussion racism. What a beautiful privilege it would be if I could choose when to be what! Unfortunately, I … More My identity is not a mask I can take off when things get tough.

Are you threatened by me?

I’m tired. I’m exhausted. I’ve considered giving up many times. It doesn’t matter how much I tone police myself. It doesn’t matter how many rainbows and unicorns I sprinkle on top of my blogs and videos. I always get the backlash about how I’m ungrateful, how I’m bitter, how I’m an “ugly chink”, and how … More Are you threatened by me?

Who do I look like?

What is it like to look in the mirror when you don’t know anyone you are biologically related to? Do most people look at themselves and have those quick thoughts about how they have their mother’s eyes or their father’s nose? What do I think about? I question who I look like. I question what … More Who do I look like?

It’s Not About Being Beautiful. It’s About Being Comfortable.

I stared into the mirror with frustration growing inside of me. I had been trying to apply liquid, winged eyeliner for the last twenty minutes. Nothing was working. I had applied, wiped off, and re-applied too many times now. Tears were starting to form. No. I could not cry. That would ruin the rest of … More It’s Not About Being Beautiful. It’s About Being Comfortable.