Becoming AdopteeLilly

When an adoptee has the floor, do not derail the conversation to prove how woke you are. My name is Lillian飞岗 Schmaltz, and this is my story. October 15, 1994, I was born in Nanning, Guangxi. Approximately 3 days later, I was found at the local police station and brought to the Nanning Social Welfare … More Becoming AdopteeLilly

Adopted kids grow up to be (outspoken) adult adoptees.

I’m not here to provide loopholes. I’m not spending my time answering questions that are so obviously used to gain permission to continue unhealthy behavior. I am not an enabler. I will have genuine conversations with you that challenge your beliefs. I may play devil’s advocate to force you into considering unknown perspectives. I’ll call … More Adopted kids grow up to be (outspoken) adult adoptees.

Gaslighting at its finest

Something really gross happened this morning. In a comment, someone resorted to gaslighting and claimed my advocacy is the reason why no one is lining up to adopt from foster care–they’ll gladly wait years for that “blank-slate” newborn. I don’t have enough empathy. I’m too judgmental. For adopted people, there is almost always an element … More Gaslighting at its finest

Stability.

Stability used to be the most important thing to her. She would sacrifice other areas of her life if it meant she didn’t have to deal with change. She was still doing that. Even after everything. She wasn’t happy in life, but being stable was more important than being happy. She was gaining strength. She … More Stability.

Ask Again, Yes

5/5 stars This book has left me speechless. I thought I would be writing my longest review yet, but I cannot wrap my mind around how incredible this story is. What an outstanding book that fell into my lap at exactly the right time. This story is fast paced as it moved through 4 decades … More Ask Again, Yes

Just another week

I walked out this morning and instead of being hit with the normal wall of hot, humid air, I felt a temperate breeze. Hopeful, I pulled open my weather app to see what the high was for today. Don’t fret. I was immediately crushed. Today, the high is 103 Fahrenheit and it “feels like” 108. … More Just another week